Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Better Than Expected

Last night Emmanuel was showing me some pictures, including ones from his sister Anne's camera from when they went to Greece last year. It just took me back to that time, way before we were ever to touch each other, when he was still in another country, nothing new there, but all he could do was to leave me a couple of text messages and skype with me on his tiny lappy and oh how I missed him so.

Now I literally just have to climb upstairs and there he is... In my room. On my bed. Sleeping.

So far it's all been going better than I expected with him, and that's rare for me because my imagination usually gets me disappointed by reality.

Maybe I've grown into a more realist person, or maybe he's just that awesome. 

Passed out on my belly after eating a shitload of food

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Slowwww dowwwnnn, tiiiimmmeee!

It feels like it was just yesterday when I congratulated Emmy for surviving a whole week in the Philippines without catching anything. Today it's Saturday and I honestly didn't see the time pass by. It's been ten days! We have a lot more days to come, but I still feel like I just want to pull on the reins and pause everything.

Sometimes I freak him out when I start getting emotional over the thought of letting him go. He freaks out but always knows what to say. He said I'm allowed to worry about not being able to step up in life, but I'm not allowed to worry about us. He promised that we'll only need to wait half the time we already have, and it will be nothing in comparison. Says he'll get me in that plane even if he had to come here and put me in himself.

Of course when he says something so sweet I end up shedding a few more tears anyway, cos FUCK he's just so awesome and sweet man >:'(

He tried to fix my sadness by making us planning stuff for the days to come, so our days will be filled and will feel longer. :) Of course the rain comes in the way, but it's still a very reassuring thing that he'd try to make things better for me even when I confuse him. :3

PS: He loooved Choco Mucho. hahaha.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Blissed Out

I've been away for a while and I'm sorry! Two things:

  1. I just got my laptop back! All my files are gone. heh.
  2. This:
Trying out "fun stuff" from the grocery that they don't have at home

    And we've been having various cute couple cheap dates :3 You know you're poor college students when your first meal ever alone together is Burger King ;) 

(We seem to LOVE chicken burgers. The other day we ordered McDonalds and ordered FOUR burgers for ourselves. He ate three. Hahahaha. Fast food is apparently three times as expensive in France.)

He's been here for a whole week and a few hours already, time goes both fast and slow. I haven't been blogging cos it feels silly to do while he's beside me u no wat i mean? I've been having full days since he's been here, waking up early, sleeping at midnight, going out a lot... We're still fairly lazy though, like our usual selves. He brought a bunch of films and series to show me and I really enjoy them!

Some stuff I learned:

  • We just make sense together. Everything's so easy. Especially since we've kind of established the fact (for 20 months) that we're very different people, but once he got here it became obvious that we were wrong! We're actually quite alike. We used to often cringe at each other's music taste etc when we were still apart, but now that we're together, I realize that if the stuff plays in the background/atmosphere while we're beside each other they actually don't bring us apart but rather together. It's weird. But awesome.
  • He's full of surprises. He keeps impressing me! We were so worried about so many things before he got here, especially the food. 
    • He's quite picky, and even his dad was teasing him about how he'll find eating in the Philippines very troublesome. But he's eaten EVERYTHING so far. I'm so pleased :3 He would often report that he hasn't eaten in a day which was a bit distressing but here, he actually keeps reporting that he's hungry heheheh so yea he eats like a normal person here. :D 
    • I've took him with me to commute everywhere, and he just goes with it. You don't understand, he was terrified of the concept of tricycles before he came! But so far he's taken ten or so tricycle rides. I also showed him jeepney magic. (How ten butts can fit in a space that seems to have been made for seven)
  • I was worried for nothing re: my chubbyness and his skinnyness. I kind of feared a bit that we'd look ridiculous beside each other, but we actually look... kinda cute together? :D
  • He's fricken hilarious! Wha! I can't even... His brain is so... ...He's the best.

Today we're going to Alabang to see a movie! :D Like we've always wanted to do together! You know, cute normal couple stuff? It's so exciting to be able to do them now! Yay. :D

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Mission: Failed

I tried to catch rats and mice by setting up fly paper on the floor (used to work on mice)

Instead they ended up killing 6 lizards :(

I love lizards :(

They eat insects.

Who knows, they may have eaten a young cockroach or two before they grew bigger?

RIP lizards :(

Wednesday, July 4, 2012


I'm a wreck right now.

I'm currently under pressure from the following:

  • Finishing my thesis book and my documentary for school (a.k.a. finally graduating)
  • Beginning my financial growth as a person
  • Beginning my "career" (mainly cause I don't even know what it's gonna be yet)
  • Emmanuel's arrival and letting him live with my family for two months! I'm very anxious about my mom. I guess it's natural though.

I'm just hoping it's a good thing in the greater scheme of things. If there's one thing that has been missing in my journey to self-betterment it's actually eustress, or positive pressure. I don't get stressed out easily, which is great, but when you get so good at it and you actually have none of it, even the good kind, what happens is you lose motivation as well.

Luckily life has a way of kicking you in the butt when you need it! (Not just to reprimand, but to propel you too)

  1. my computer crashed, and I felt like I woke up from a trance wherein I breathed internet and can't do much else. I wake up, sit down in front of my laptop, carry it downstairs to eat, carry it back upstairs to shower, etc etc.. I lost track of time. I just realized yesterday that I missed the deadline for application of graduation AGAIN. You'd think I'd learn my lesson from doing the same thing last semester. Nope.
  2. realizing how broke i am and the youtube-uploaded Rich Dad Poor Dad audiobook coming my way shortly afterwards
  3. two of my best friends FINDING JOBS within two weeks :O Felt slow in comparison, yeah, but also felt like "Hey, life is really starting now!", and to be honest, when it comes to rivalry, seeing my best pals succeed actually make me feel empowered instead of ashamed about not being like them for now. I feel like GOING THERE. Yknowhatimean.

Sidenote: It's amazing what little triumphs like killing a cockroach can do to one's self-esteem. I just saw the cockroach I ran away from yesterday and because there was a guest (home masseuse waiting for my mom to get ready) I felt the pressure I needed to step up and eliminate the critter. (sorry. but i tried to make it quick.) It's a GREAT thing the bug spray was still inside the house from where i left it after i sprayed around my window (preparing it for Emmy's stay! Making sure no ants will come in.) Sorry if it's morbid but I feel a lot better now. Update: It wasn't the same one. I found the actual one from last night. But it's also dead now R.I.P

Pressure is not the best feeling in the world, but I welcome it fully. I have to will change my habits. I will form new ones. I will make life work for me. I will figure shit out and make a huge, lasting improvement in my life, set goals, and accomplish them.

When I was a bit younger I thought brain plasticity ends at 20, but something I watched recently said it's 30.

There might be eight years of hope left for me yet!

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Ten Days.

It's July 1.

I can clearly remember when we first talked about you coming for a visit, and we finally realized that we'll have to wait for twenty months before you could come. It seemed like such a long time to wait.

But here we are now.

Ten days away :)

Can't wait to hug you and kiss you and hold your hand and take you home :D