Wednesday, September 26, 2012

tiny improvements

I have big goals that are still unresolved. But I try to keep my eyes peeled for reason to keep my spirits up, to pat myself on the back every now and then. It tends to be discouraging when my perceived "victories" are too few and far apart in between and it spoils the mood of the process.

In trying to be more conscientious with my actions, I seem to have erred to the side of limiting myself from "enjoying too much"... Today I remembered that my happiness is the big picture. Every effort I make towards feeling better about myself, or having society-dictated badges of honour boils down to me trying to feel good. To feel happy. Surely there are enjoyable things that need to be put aside for more important tasks, but in between tasks, there is no reason to keep myself from doing little side-projects that boost my daily happiness levels.

That's where these come in:

1) My mom bought a new towel rack for her bathroom, so she passed on her old one (which is actually relatively new, only a couple months old) to me, and I enjoyed looking for a place for it. It matches the other fixtures in my bathroom, as I was very happy to notice. All shiny and silvery.

2) I painted my room, bathroom, and drawer keys. The designs on them are actually representative of what they open! If the world spoke in codes, it would be very clear what they're for. My bedroom key has an alien on one side (for my alien tie that's tied around the doorknob) and a blue feather on the other (I have a blue feather stuck to my door). My bathroom key has black and white checkers on one side for my black and white tiles, and neon green dots on the other side for the neon green details inside my bathroom. The key for my drawer has a metallic blue heart. Inside my drawer is a tiny blue chest with sort of the same finish, and just across the drawer is my bathroom door, which has a blue 8-bit heart illustrated on it with squares of blue duct tape.

3) I made a face/hand towel holder with various random objects from my room. I found the curtain rod hinge a while back and displayed it by pinching a level of the computer desk with the tong-like parts. My mirror didn't have that, and I didn't want to puncture the wall, so I balanced the right angles at the end with chopsticks that I sneaked behind the wall, instead of screwing them on. The rings are also random objects I found lying around; I cut them with pliers so I could use them as binders for flashcards in the future, but this is as good use as any. The beddazled apple is something beardy's sister gave to him that he passed on to me.

My current workspace
Full Disclosure Time: As for life changes that are actually crucial, I'm in the middle of accomplishing two looming leftover requirements from semesters past; the only things that are in between me and my diploma. It's kinda frustrating, and there's so much pent up tension invested in them. Most especially my thesis paper. I set up this blog for my daily(-ish) self monitoring / progress report whatevers,  and wrote more about it there, if you're interested. I'm making improvements, however tiny they may be, but you know.. *pats self on the back*

My mom wants to take us to a mini vacation in HK+Macau around Halloween (where I'm planning to dress up as Minnie Mouse in freakin' Disneyland) and after that I'm supposed to start working, wherever work will be. I'll have to resign after six months to go to France for the summer (I know, huge feat) to be with beardy again and that makes it a bit complicated. But I guess I can just resign if I'm not on contract. I have no idea how these things work and I'm nervous, anxious, excited. If I figure it all out I'm going to feel like I'm on top of the world.

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